Babies are hilarious, especially when they're not yours. That is, when you get to do the OMG YOU ARE SERIOUSLY THE CUTEST THING EVER and get to look the other way and run when it's nappy time, feeding time, vomiting time, etc.
In college, we used to have streams of kids coming past us on some tour or another and my college mates would go 'OMG, WHO ARE THESE LITTLE PEOPLE? YOU GUYS ARE SO CUTE!'
I digress! There was some serious money (to a student anyway) to be made at the time by being a student guide around my college and my friend Di offered to do it. What you would basically do is to lead the kids around the college with their teacher/guide, and show them the Hall, the lawns, gibbering about the history of the college, and the student rooms.
Cut back to a few weeks before that, two of my college mates (we'll call them A and B) decided, for a joke, they would try and bling up a remote control car. They went to the toy store and got themselves a Matchbox RC car. This type was exceptionally small, and this is an important point. They had plans, you see.
Anyways they had a couple of days fun driving the tinny thing about, then they got to Phase 2 of their plan. They purchased another item.
Yes, a boobie mouse. The boobs are actually suspended in liquid (like some car compasses) and will jiggle like crazy when you shake them! Awesome stuff.
Anyways they took off the mouse 'shell' and threw away the rest.
Then they took the car shell off, and threw the shell away.
Then they combined the boobie shell and the RC car body into
A boobie RC car.
To this date I so regret not taking a picture of the thing. It didn't work very well - the shell was a bit too big and kept catching on the carpet, but that just made the boobies jiggle even more. A and B took immense pleasure in chasing the girls in their corridor with it, and the girls would duly comply, shrieking and running up and down the corridor at top speed.
So anyways. Back to Di, who is showing teachers and kids around the college, and just gets around to the student rooms.
Di : So these are the student quarters, where students hang out and study between lectures.
Kids : Oooooh.
Suddenly Rachel runs top speed down the corridor screaming in mock terror.
Rachel : AAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Boobie RC Car races crazily after Rachel, boobies jiggling on the verge of flying right off.
A and B then runs after Rachel and the Boobie Car, with A at the controls. They are laughing fit to kill themselves.
A and B: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH. No, wait, Rachel....AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
There was this precious moment where Di, the kids and A and B looked at each other (Rachel was long gone but the Boobie Car was still jiggling inappropriately in front of the kids)
Di : [shell-shocked for words]
Kids : ......
A and B: Hey kids...HAHA....erm...HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA [runs into the nearest unlocked student room and closes the door.
So yeah, that was university.
Anyways, to babies.
In college, we used to have streams of kids coming past us on some tour or another and my college mates would go 'OMG, WHO ARE THESE LITTLE PEOPLE? YOU GUYS ARE SO CUTE!'
I digress! There was some serious money (to a student anyway) to be made at the time by being a student guide around my college and my friend Di offered to do it. What you would basically do is to lead the kids around the college with their teacher/guide, and show them the Hall, the lawns, gibbering about the history of the college, and the student rooms.
Cut back to a few weeks before that, two of my college mates (we'll call them A and B) decided, for a joke, they would try and bling up a remote control car. They went to the toy store and got themselves a Matchbox RC car. This type was exceptionally small, and this is an important point. They had plans, you see.
Anyways they had a couple of days fun driving the tinny thing about, then they got to Phase 2 of their plan. They purchased another item.
Yes, a boobie mouse. The boobs are actually suspended in liquid (like some car compasses) and will jiggle like crazy when you shake them! Awesome stuff.
Anyways they took off the mouse 'shell' and threw away the rest.
Then they took the car shell off, and threw the shell away.
Then they combined the boobie shell and the RC car body into
A boobie RC car.
To this date I so regret not taking a picture of the thing. It didn't work very well - the shell was a bit too big and kept catching on the carpet, but that just made the boobies jiggle even more. A and B took immense pleasure in chasing the girls in their corridor with it, and the girls would duly comply, shrieking and running up and down the corridor at top speed.
So anyways. Back to Di, who is showing teachers and kids around the college, and just gets around to the student rooms.
Di : So these are the student quarters, where students hang out and study between lectures.
Kids : Oooooh.
Suddenly Rachel runs top speed down the corridor screaming in mock terror.
Rachel : AAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Boobie RC Car races crazily after Rachel, boobies jiggling on the verge of flying right off.
A and B then runs after Rachel and the Boobie Car, with A at the controls. They are laughing fit to kill themselves.
A and B: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH. No, wait, Rachel....AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
There was this precious moment where Di, the kids and A and B looked at each other (Rachel was long gone but the Boobie Car was still jiggling inappropriately in front of the kids)
Di : [shell-shocked for words]
Kids : ......
A and B: Hey kids...HAHA....erm...HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA [runs into the nearest unlocked student room and closes the door.
So yeah, that was university.
Anyways, to babies.
Pwning Hillary
Baby Ally Whatever - don't search for other versions, the imitations are horrendous and will scar you mentally for life:
The clip that got me looking at crazy babies:
So yeah, to summarise, get a baby, so I can play with it. Him/Her.
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